With my youngest daughter leaving primary school this year, I helped out at my last school summer fair, lending a hand to a small band of people who put up stalls, hang bunting and cook food.

Every year, it is hard work, and, considering the size of the school, very few parents come along to help.

Having spent the past nine years mucking in, I have pooled those experiences and drawn upon the animal kingdom to compile a list of parent-helper types. I know by doing so I’m at risk of annoying people, but I do that anyway, so here goes: Worker ants Beaver away tirelessly and unquestioningly, seeking out another job the second they finish the previous one. Always on the go, they are rarely spotted without a chair or other useful item in their hands.

Lions Show up mid-way through a job and noisily hurl themselves into it like a lion requisitioning another beast’s kill. They take over and start barking orders, insisting that their way of putting up a gazebo is far superior to the manufacturer’s instructions.

Wildebeest Roam around seemingly looking for something to do, but never seem to actually knuckle down.

Chimpanzees Use the occasion as a social gathering where they can have an extended chin-wag with friends, supping endless cuppas.

Beavers Very resourceful – they will nip off home to get extra bits and pieces – tent pegs, rope or balloons.

Foxes Start something then suddenly go to ground, disappearing for three hours before coming back, having ‘popped to the shops’.

Doves Only really want to help out if their best friend is involved. They spend the day doing things together.

Cats (pedigree Persian) Like pampered creatures, who spend their housebound lives on cushions, they help, but only safe, relatively cushy sit-down activities.

Sloths Year after year, do absolutely nothing but always turn up, like the animals in the children’s book The Little Red Hen.

So what category do I come into? I’d say predominantly ant, but with a touch of cat on the side. I’ve longed to be a dove, but sadly my best friends are sloths.